ultranow

pavel novotny is all about dick and foosball

after the jump because foosball is adults only.

it's always time for a huey lewis bulge

back when he was popular, i was so distracted by his wonderful voice and music and musicality and music and tone and lyrics and melodies that i didn't even notice the bulge. oh wait, it was the other way around.

jennifer hudson national anthem

jenhud is going to sing the national anthem at the superbowl (which i think is a tennis competition) so here's a preview of her singing it (or sanging it) for damn real so damn hard fuck yes on some other occasion. remember it's not like it's that great a song (burt bacharach didnt write it and neither did harold arlen) but she killllllls it. power to the jennifer. power to the people.

cute as a button oli james on english lads

oli james is a lifeguard and gymnast. i think he's just smashing. is that a british word? find him at english lads now. don't let the innocent smile fool you. he nasty!

p.s. oli and hundreds of other nude english lads are waiting.

belated inauguration bitchfest

missing: debbie allen choreographed production number

missing: decent inaugural poem. did you know the poet elizabeth alexander denounced maya angelou's clinton inaugural poem "on the pulse of morning" in the ny times this past december as "touchy-feely", along with blasting myriad other inaugural poems, then proceeded to drain the energy of a nation with her crapfest (according to me) "praise song for the day"? "Some live by love thy neighbor as thyself, / Others by first, do no harm or take no more / than you need. What if the mightiest word is love?" yeah, shut the fuck up elizabeth.

missing: live gay sex show

missing: stage diving

missing: topless yo-yo ma

missing: laura bush's mental deadening meds. no strike that. she was loaded.

coming in february: in the life black history month edition

here's the preview. now to find out when the february edition will air in your local area, or to stream or download it (in feb.), go to inthelifetv.org. meanwhile, the january episode is still up. while ugly betty is gay, it's not this gay. um, i mean lgbt. um, i mean lgbtiqq.

ricardo montalban is like totally dead now

oh no!!! star trek biggies are on their way out. majel barrett-roddenberry passed december 18. today ricardo montalban. which star trek legend will die mid-february? can't be a red shirt. they're all dead already. at this point, no matter who it is, it would hurt, even if it were egomaniac shatner. but see montalban was pretty much the best original star trek villain ever, perhaps second only to the silicon egg laying pizza monster. who else made such an impact from the original series that s/he was brought back to reprise the role (in this case khan) in a movie 15+ years later? plus he had great moobs and broke racial barriers in hollywood and i'm sure was a sweet lay.

still i was kinda seriously creeped out by fantasy island, though i know many loved it. it came on after love boat and i didn't want to lose the light love boat vibe and get weirded out by that damn prop-filled, animatronic, time-distorting, '70s magic island. plus it was kinda on after my bedtime anyway. so i'll remember him as khan mostly but i know he was more than that. it's so difficult to resist the urge to freeze him so he can be revived hundreds of years from now, because that's how khan originated. but we all know freezing just turns everything to mush. still a fuck doll of him would be nice. i'm just saying.

workout: pumping house

need some energetic beats and vocal inspiration to keep your workout pulsing in 2009 or just want some music to fuck by? your answer is the pleasure packed new cd workout: pumping house. now i've been busting my ass at the gym since august (packed on a bunch of muscle thank you) and this collection reminds me i need to mix up my tunes just as much as my exercise routine. since i can't count on my gym to play exceptional house (which by it's very nature takes me back to my late teens early 20s high nrg days) i need to fill it in with my own soundtrack for my own body. here's my skinny on selected tracks:

• workout - rupaul (tony puccio remix): nice smooth way to start. ru's vocals are yummy and fierce lite. this house has character and 40 inch heels. later ru build it up with a harder looking good, feeling gorgeous mix. rupaul is still a dance music superstar dammit.
• mindbuster - jocelyn brown and oliver cheatha (frankie c radio mix): hello 1979 with a time machine trip to future music technology. how come house duets never seem that heterosexual? oh yeah, cause they're not.
• that sound - brinsley evans ft. sy smith (funky junction and antony reale radio mix): she's got a great semi-scratch to her voice. it catches just right with the mix. faster faster. lift in time. legwarmers not required.
• found a cure - plaza people: this is my new cardio anthem!
• do you like my body? - the lollypop gang (audiophreakz vocal radio mix): reminder that at least 49% of the reason you're working out is to be more fuckable, or at least look it. "i see it in your eyes you want to dance with me..." oh yeah, gyms are also for cruising so replace dance with date and you're set for a social life of possibility and hope. just be nice cause you'll see him at the gym again.
• ding dong (pick up the phone bitch) - cell phish (money and fun club mix): thick beats get in my brain good. stay a bit longer at the gym. workout loud. workout strong. your body is your body is ready to move ready for more weight. hypnotized by this workout house.
• one nation - darrell martin vs. paul cortes (groovepusher mix): we're all a family on the workout floor. all reaching for our own perfection. oh you don't need to look like the guy on the cover of the cd. you knew that right? still this music will help you feel that desire to be your best self and workout: pumping house gives you the tunes you need to help make it happen.

p.s. if you get the hard copy (from amazon for example) you get a 7 day pass to bally's. plus both the 2 cd set and the mp3 version features an over hour long megamix perfect for interval training.

amazon | itunes | official site

dueling fuckholes

manly duel after the jump.

nude uncut pristine redhead

lovely peaceful naked man after the jump. is "suckready" a word?