ultranow

there are as many crotchblocking techniques as there are crotches

laws of physics defying ebay scowler

exactly how is his bulge showing so clearly through both yellow underwear and black shorts and exactly how is he getting away with that camo hat when it's after labor day and exactly when is it not after labor day except on labor day and exactly where in space and time is he cause i'm fucking his tits now yet he is also in a plain white room far away from me and exactly why is he so angry did daddy go to the grocery store for a carton of milk and never come back?

ebay metaphor for my current sex life

ebay deathgaze robot

ebay spandex bulge moment

seriously bitchy ebay critiques

could you take your precious watch off before you put on your silver spandex superhero bodysuit? i know you don't want to miss the bus to the gym, but please! and would a less drab background, as in any background at all, have killed you? if this is what a superhero wears around the house, what do you wear on the job, a giant faberge egg?

why skimp on the grease, mary? be an ebay sleaze fashionista and oil up your gams and mug too. props for the sunglasses though. you're dead on right trying to disguise yourself. p.s. i'd still suck your dick in a second (after i rip off and burn your necklace) so leave the skank grease off that manmeat.

next time you stuff your hideous geometry crotch, try something more realistically penis-and-balls-shaped (like a penis and balls) versus a run over teddy bear or 27 hefty bags or whatever the hell is in there that is totally extremely not penis and balls. p.s. penis and balls.

ebay word association

lurid ego tease

bulge bulging bulgy bulgiferous apple

no pants ballet

close tight mine

psychotic

absolute truth

at 3:30am i was eating these transfat free "wholesome & delicious" snack miracles (the whole bag minus one) watching gabrielle union on a conan o'brien rerun because i don't have...

do it yourself pornography

someone please photoshop a prom or wedding behind these guys and e-mail the pic to me because it is hard to fill in a porn script in my head when they are posing in a sears photo studio. i'd prefer to imagine miss pass out drunk drank too much at his senior prom and needs to be driven home by his best buddy and be undressed before being put in bed otherwise the rented suit would wrinkle and when his friend sees him passed out naked (still with his dress shoes on because that would be hot) red light action ensues. without a more natural background, i am forced to assume that in order to pay for their senior proms in real life, they posed like this for $1.98 each for a sears photo studio pornographer after hours.

cheers to ebulges.com for posting a million more ebay bulges, so i don't need to fill in the gap and search for myself again. though i realized i enjoy searching and sharing the spoils. so here's another one. this may be on ebulges too. i didn't have time to look through their entire new crop of pics. i believe i will continue to enjoy spotting the ebay bulge in it's natural habitat, the cold cruel world of sex motivated commerce.

ebay softcore mini-extravaganza

since ebulges.com has not updated since august i was forced to go to ebay on my own to find the handiwork of the latest crop of exhibitionist salesmen. on ebay as in life, less means more money.

didn't rita hayworth lift her gown like that in "gilda"?

speedos untied. let me help you with that.

of all the thumb ring wearing leathermen who sit on trashcans a la oscar the grouch, you're the dreamiest!