based on rebecca romijn's non-acting chops (except when she's naked and blue as mystique) and the wb launching a new show the spring before the big wb/upn merger fall launch as the new cw network thing, i'm going to go out on a limb and say pepper dennis is wretched and pointless. the fact that it premiers tomorrow won't change my insisting it's awful. and wretched. and pointless. allow me to translate the pr.
"Pepper [spunky] Dennis (Rebecca Romijn, "X-Men," "Just Shoot Me" [cancelled]) is a beautiful [tits] and ambitious [ass] reporter [skirts above the knee] with her sights [hormones] set on anchoring Chicago's [oprah's] top-rated evening news broadcast. Just when Pepper [vagina] thinks she's about to land her dream anchor job, her hot [emotionally unavailable] new guy, Charlie Babcock [barbra streisand] (Josh Hopkins, "The Perfect Storm," "Ally McBeal" [cancelled]), shows up in the newsroom [handmedown set from the last failed newsroom show] and steals the job out from under her [beaver]. Complicating [b-plot] Pepper's daily life [yogurt commercial] is her needy [brazilian wax] and recently separated [nipple rouge] sister Kathy (Brooke Burns [hired to make rebecca romijn look like a good actress by comparison], "North Shore," "Baywatch" [double cancelled]) , who has moved in with her [cunnilingus]. Only Pepper's close friends [analingus] and co-workers, makeup artist Kimmy [lesbian] (Lindsay Price, "Beverly Hills, 90210" [i hate brenda]) and cameraman Chick [name for 1950s suckboy] (Rider Strong, "Boy Meets World" [what?]), seem to feel her pain [desperation for an acting gig]."
and now to drive home my pointless point with some handy visuals.
good pepper
angie dickinson as sgt. pepper anderson in policewoman
good (though unfortunately now dead) pepper
pepper labeija (left) of paris is burning fame
bad pepper
dead on arrival pepper dennis
well, she's actually kind of nice. and funny. and likes to make fun of herself. john stamos also.
believe it.
or not.
Posted by: mo | May 07, 2006 at 06:00 PM