ultranow

review and contest: c.r.a.z.y.

c.r.a.z.y., just out on dvd, proves the coming out movie is not dead, as long as it's peppered with original symbolism (yes, this is still possible), daydreaming during church, furtive sex, familial magic, slow motion violence and patsy cline.  oh and it also has to be french canadian, have more cigarette and doobie smoke than a prom limo, be full of stellar performances both subtle and full-forced, and be a complete visual and auditory package.  under jean-marc vallée's skillful direction, and featuring engrossing, sometimes frustratingly realistic lead performances by michel côté as patriarch gervais beaulieu, danielle proulx as mother laurianne (who acts with just her back as well as powerhouse sada thompson) and marc-andré grondin and émile vallée as son zachary from 6 to 21, this film shines moment to moment, almost more so than it does as a whole.  filmgoers agreed, doling out 10 genie awards (canada's version of oscar).

it accomplishes the impossible, eliciting sympathy for the homophobic, unaccepting father, possibly because back when zachary was born, christmas day 1960 (symbolism!), the word homophobic had yet to be invented (i think).  too often we give up on the idea or reality of family in our lives and in so doing we give up on who we are.  whether or not there are people to fill the roles of father, of brother, of lover, this film reminds that the need for connection must be maintained, if not for blood relatives or a teenage lover to help one through one's own teen years, then the connection with that desire within oneself.  else it fade.

homo teen angst should not have a statue of limitations, even after the teen years have officially passed, because desire can one day be met.  in a hug.  in a strong hug.  this is a powerful movie.  to be seen.  i didn't necessarily see myself in zachary or maybe i did so much i can't even name how.  i watched a gay movie and didn't look for my own story for once.  instead i saw zachary and his brothers and his father and mother.  i saw his hairstyles, room and clothes change to denote the passage of time.  i saw his life for years.  i saw his desire.  i saw his pain.  i saw his simple celebrations.  and i believed it all.

contest:  i have one copy for giveaway.  post a comment for your chance to win.  make sure to include your e-mail.  you must be a u.s. resident (horrible i know since the flick is french canadian, but that's the rule).

winner is damion of queering the apparatus, and not just because his was the only entry, but because he's sweet.

buy c.r.a.z.y.

review and contest: bette midler - cool yule

this is strictly gush.  i'm biased.  i'm a queer jew who once sang "friends" to myself 45 times in a row.  i'm a sucker for a mermaid in a wheelchair.  in another life, i was barry manilow accompanying miss m on piano at the continental baths.  she's flawless, okay?  i love everything about her, except her whole deal about cleaning up new york city parks and roadways and community gardens.  shouldn't nyc just be maximally filthy?

and i'm not going to bash her for being a jew singing christmas songs on the smooth, cozy, inviting, polished and lovely cool yule, shockingly her first holiday cd.   barbra streisand did a mean jingle bells, a lipsync drag queen classic, so why not?  these are fine songs and they're not all christmas songs actually, with "i've got my love to keep me warm" and "what are you doing new year's eve?" jazzing it up non-sectarian style.  plus she duets with creamy voiced johnny mathis on "winter wonderland/let it snow! let it snow! let it snow!", kicking it off with a little patter that would fit perfectly on a sesame street album:

bette: "you know johnny, you're the king of christmas, why don't you start the song?"

johnny: "i can't." 

bette: "why not?"

johnny: "because it's in your key."

bette: "sleighbells ring, are you listening..."

my favorite uniquely bette number is "mele kalikimaka", the perfect 1950's hawaiian bubblegum holiday pop song you didn't know you've always needed.  she was born in hawaii you know and the first song she performed in public was a christmas song.  she was afraid to tell her mother, but it turned out to be just fine and her mother was proud of her just the same.  it's music.  it's universal.  bette's not universal.  she doesn't need to be.  she's bette.

get the cd

contest:  i have one copy to giveaway with perfect holiday timing.  for your chance to win, just post a comment and make sure to include your e-mail.  you must be a u.s. resident.  i'll randomly draw the winner.  enter today and let ultranow and bette bring you some holiday cheer.

update:  thanks to those who entered.  randomly drawn winner is bonnie!  bette's on her way. 

contest: goldfrapp - we are glitter

update:  contest closed.  winner was gunn.  and here's hoping someone lets him leave the pj harvey on someday.

win the goldfrapp cd i just gushed about before it hits the stores.  now for my money electronica is the most exceptional soundtrack for sex (sorry, mr. vandross) but i know everyone has their own preferences for music to shag/schtup/cream by.  hey, a little flesh for lulu back in the late '80s worked wonders for me, so i can mix it up too.  nina simone, anyone?

to enter: just post a comment about your most favorite (or even most hated) song you've ever done "it" to.  tell us the name of the song and a little about the "it" or "who" or "what" you did, however graphic or non-graphic you'd like.  make sure to fill in your e-mail in the comment form.  my favorite comment gets the prize and everyone gets the joy of sharing.

contest: unexpected dreams - songs from the stars

for the scoop on this up for grabs cd read my review.  first person to comment on this post with marissa jaret winokur's home phone number wins a copy.  okay actually, the first person to comment with marissa jaret winokur's famous line from american beauty wins. make sure to include your e-mail when you comment.

update: the winner is h of hor.diaryland.com whose name i choose to pronounce not "aitch" but "hunnnnnnnhhhh" as if it were that ejaculatory moment during relax by frankie goes to hollywood. oy, this coming from a person whose name is the same as the quicktime file extension ".avi".  you can hear the famous line on marissa's site. i never saw american beauty.  i've been powerless to get past kevin spacey bringing his mother as his date to all the awards shows.  how very clifton webb closet case 1949.

review and contest: moby. live - hotel tour 2005

here's the review part: who among us has not had sex with a guy or girl who kinda looked like moby? i dare say none. while that is enough of a reason to pick up the recently released moby. live - hotel tour 2005 dvd, there's also the feast of music and visuals. moby always seemed like a pure studio musician/computer geek to me, so seeing him "electronic" out live is a treat. he likes to yell and bounce and sing/mutter and the audience is enraptured and excited, veritably hypnotized. the crowd is an object in motion which tends to stay in motion, though there is not a mosh pit in sight as that would be too violent but in their heads they are moshing. either that or thinking about tea as moby's other key venture is teany.

streams of raining again and lift me up will clue you in on the live feel. the package includes five full length videos and a cd of remixes. you are guaranteed to at least hum and tap your foot, or whatever other way you uncontrollably follow along to music should you be missing a throat and foot, which moby would be perfectly okay with and understanding of as he is liberal and polite. or just possibly, you'll pretend you are his sometimes song partner (when he is in the mood for a hit) gwen stefani and dye your hair white blond and put on some tight shorts and a tube top and dance like a maniac, singing into a tube of lipstick.

here's the contest part: comment with a moby inspired/related haiku. best one over the next couple of days or so wins a free copy direct from the factory (no pirating here) mailed to your hut, igloo or loft for your listening and viewing pleasure. the only thing you won't win is tea.

and the winner is...the only non-gayhating entry:

mopey moby man
hey! Is that my boyfriend there?
no...glare off bald head.