ultranow

coming soon to an angry gay wall near you

via british beef

norman rockwell would roll over in his grave (on top of another man)

19th century lolcat

can hazeth fromageburger

proof it isn't dead

yeah he said it

[via mightyg-dking]

two right feet

i drew this with pastels a few years ago. what was i thinking? maybe you know.

attraction test

are you okay with only seeing outlines or do you need to view what the outlines represent (after the jump)? when you see a human in person or in photo, do you know how much of your attraction is based on shape and how much is based on dimensionality, texture, color, expression and life?

the vicodin monologues

pigs on parade is back on the seattle streets and it took about two seconds of one of the sculptures being in westlake center for someone to rip its wings off, thereby destroying the when pigs fly metaphor.  can people please leave public art totally the fuck alone?

my wisdom tooth i had out last week got infected, or should i say the hole that remained got infected, so i'm in total hideous pain, partially from the gut wrenching antibiotics.  for awhile there, i was doing a steve lawrence impression, which if you're old enough you'll know i'm talking about that guy who looked like one side of his jaw was constantly swollen.

my bus driver today kept jerking the bus like it was his minus first day on the job, plus he was singing and talking to himself like a maniac which made me terrified.  more terrified than normal.  this was better than tuesday, when this bag lady, oh i'm sorry that's rude, this bummette paid her fare in pennies.  as in 150 pennies.  she put a plastic bag on the floor of the bus and kept hunching over to pick up handfuls over and over.  i was heard to utter "jesus fucking christ get off the fucking bus, lady."  and i meant it.

when i was getting my antibiotic and extra vicodin prescription filled, i ran into someone i knew through an old job and she told me she sold a design to ikea.  of course i looked it up and it turns out to be true.  see hallaryd.  her artwork, which i personally think is kinda boring, at least in its ikea incarnation, is now in thousands of people's houses, and was in a set shot on dancing with the stars, though that last part i can't fact check because i hate dancing with the stars.  what kills reality shows for me are when i hate one or more of the judges, and on that show i hate all three.  i'm trying to watch so you think you can dance, but i hate mary murphy and mia michaels, so that's going to be tough.

it's amazing how grumpy constant pain can make me.  of course, it's better than what someone else i know has:  flesh eating bacteria on his face.  i'm totally not kidding.  the hospital let him out after giving him antibiotics, but then he had to go back because it was antibiotic resistant flesh eating bacteria.  so blame the healthcare system for not appropriately quarantining contagious people.  don't scapegoat the individuals.  except for typhoid mary.  it was totally her fault she gave everyone her bubonic plague, i mean typhoid.  but speaking of bubonic plague, if you get bubonic plague in your boobs, is it called, boobubonic plague?

wow, posting on vicodin is intense.  time for more hardboiled eggs.  is that hyphenated?

that sepia homosexual look

i'm out $50

someone e-mailed me thinking i offered these services i'd previously covered  how much would i charge they asked, because they had some pictures of their daughter they needed done.  i would have thought my editorializing with the word "horrifying" would have implied that i did not do such things but was merely commenting on them.  i kindly referred them to the appropriate resource, though was tempted to request the pictures, do a horrifying job in seashore (open source photoshop type program), and have them paypal me like $50.  but that would be wrong so i didn't because i'm nice.  now where's my $50 for being nice!?